It doesn't matter if you have a day job in an office or you're self-employed, you

photo by Kumar Appaiah	via PhotoRee

need to be your own boss. Because if you don't take charge of what you do with yourself every day, someone else will.

That said, what kind of boss would you like to have?

Most of us have had good bosses, mediocre bosses, and bad bosses.

We've had bosses who micromanage, bully, berate, and harangue. Bosses who lead by enforcement instead of relationship, and who place no trust in our ability to do our job ourselves.

We've had bosses who are little more than puppets and figureheads. As long as they don't try to stick their noses in the actual work that's to be done, all is well. These kinds of bosses are nice until you need help; then they are useless.

And we've (hopefully) had good bosses who understand both their authority and their responsibility. Bosses who stand behind us and support our efforts, who encourage even while they correct, and who believe we have limitless potential for improvement and advancement.

When we take a job somewhere, we don't get to choose what kind of boss we'll have, but when it comes to managing ourselves, we have a choice. What kind of boss will you be?

I admit, most of the time I'm a micromanaging, legalistic, bullying kind of boss to myself. The evil boss who nitpicks and torments and provokes his/her employees. (Not only has that been a battle for ME, it's been a battle in parenting, as well. Thank God for a spouse who balances out my micro-management!)

Give me a goal, and I'll come up with the most difficult method possible of achieving it, and then belittle myself when I invariably fall short of my own expectations.

On the other hand, not expecting anything of yourself, or not expecting enough, is just as bad as being an over-achieving driven person. Both management types inspire lousy performances.

Acknowledging that each of us has authority and responsibility in our own lives, what kind of boss are you for yourself? Do you encourage yourself? Do you compliment a job well-done, or ignore it with thoughts like "it's about time"? Do you offer yourself suggestions for improvement, or beat yourself into submission with harsh rebukes and punishing behaviors?

If you're struggling with a consistent sense of "not good enough" or a repeated failure to accomplish your desires, maybe it's time to check your own boss-style, and change the way you manage yourself!